When I was a sophomore in high school, I attended class with a young man named Dale.
Dale was a weird guy. He was incredibly socially awkward.
He wasn’t physically attractive. He made people pretty uncomfortable, mostly due to his severe social ineptitude. The girls in class were especially put off by him. They often made fun of him, and avoided him like the plague.
He wasn’t particularly good at anything, and he never got invited anywhere. For the most part, people either wished that he wasn’t around, or they forgot he existed.
Now that I understand the socio sexual hierarchy, it’s clear to me that Dale was obviously an omega male. Keep reading to learn exactly what that means.
What Is an Omega Male?
Omega males are the ‘losers’ of society. I’m not saying that out of a spirit of meanness, or to make light of it. I’m saying it because this is their experience in life, and because it’s painfully true.
Women don’t just ‘dislike’ omegas. Omegas are the types of men women cross the street to avoid. They’re the types of men women overlook and ignore. To say that women are ‘disgusted’ by the idea of touching, kissing, sleeping-with, or dating an omega male would be an understatement.
This is what Vox Day himself, the creator of the socio sexual hierarchy, says about omega males:
The omega is the quintessential social reject. The omega is the one who is not even in the game where women are concerned. Whereas the gamma might be the one muttering in his beer to his friends in the corner at the party, nobody ever even thought of inviting the omega.
Why Are We Talking about the Omega Male?
The socio sexual hierarchy, created by Vox Day, is a hierarchical system that categorizes men into different social ranks via distinctly identifiable patterns of behavior. And while it isn’t a ‘be all, end all’ system for accurately pigeon-holing men into stereotypes, it’s useful as a self-awareness tool.
In other words, some men get stuck at the bottom—and it sucks. It sucks to be constantly rejected. It sucks to get bullied. It sucks to feel like nobody cares about you or wants you to succeed.
Dale, from my earlier story, was this kind of person. But he wasn’t the only one. I’ve known a handful of men like this in my lifetime.
Here at The Adult Man, our purpose is to help men level-up and become better men. And if there was ever a type of man who needed some help and encouragement to level up, it’s the archetypal omega male.
This is why I’m talking about the omega male, and why I see it as important.
I know for a fact that any man can change his destiny if he’s willing to put in the work and commit to it. And if you feel unwanted, undesired, and unfulfilled in life, it’s important for you to understand that there’s hope for a better future.
It isn’t pleasant to feel like you have zero control over your life or destiny. Life just doesn’t feel the same when you can’t get dates, score social wins, or assimilate as a high-value man into the social hierarchy.
But in this post, you’re going to learn how to change it.
Where Does the Omega Male Fit on the Socio Sexual Hierarchy?
There are 6 ranks in the socio-sexual hierarchy:
Omegas live at the very bottom.
Omega males usually endure lives of loneliness, sadness, and depression.
And sometimes, this pushes them down an even darker road. Omegas may end up identifying as ‘incels,’ take the black pill, and completely withdraw from the hierarchy out of anger, frustration, and defeat.
These ‘black pilled’ omegas succumb to what they believe is the inevitable doom of men not born with movie-star sex appeal or the silver-spoon of wealth—the false belief that there’s no hope for them in this life—that giving up is the only option, and that trying to level-up and change their destiny will only end in disappointment and failure.
Unfortunately for omega males, life is tough at the bottom of the hierarchy. Vox Day describes this in vivid detail on his blog.
Omegas – the losers. Even the Gamma males despise them. That which doesn’t kill them can make them stronger, but most never surmount the desperate need to belong caused by their social rejection. Omegas can be the most dangerous of men because the pain of their constant rejection renders the suffering of others completely meaningless in their eyes.
Alpha Male vs Omega Male
Alpha males are the top-dogs and leaders of the socio sexual hierarchy. Alphas and omegas don’t usually have much overlap. In fact, alphas rarely notice omegas, unless their presence in the hierarchy causes some kind of issue.
If omegas cause chaos in the hierarchy and throw things out of balance, however, then the alpha may step in to set things right.
For example: I used to host these wild parties when I was younger. These gatherings were well-known for the beautiful women and attractive men who attended them. People would dance, flirt, make out, etc. These were classy, fun, sexy, trendy parties—and you had to be or know someone to get invited to them.
At one point, this weird guy started attending. He was unattractive, awkward, and even bordered on being a bit on the creepy side with the women. He was most definitely an omega.
As the alpha of the group and the organizer of the parties, I made the decision to stop inviting him. I saw how adversely he affected the hierarchy, and decided to remove him from the equation to preserve its order, stability, and success.
Beta Male vs Omega Male
Beta males are the lieutenants—the alpha’s enforcers. These are the men who make sure that the rules are followed, that people stay in line, and that nobody causes chaos or trouble within the hierarchy.
It isn’t uncommon for the betas to try to ‘straighten out’ the omega if they see that he’s throwing off the usual balance of the hierarchy. They may haze him, bully him, torment him, and push him around.
In my example, a couple of my close friends (archetypal betas in this context) used to really lay into the weird guy who started coming to the parties. They got so stern with him that I told them they had to back off a few times.
Omega Male Traits: 5 Signs You’re an Omega Male
1. You’re Unattractive
For the most part, omega males don’t tend to be good looking. There are numerous advantages to being attractive. And due to no fault of their own, omegas are generally saddled with the difficult task of trying to succeed in life with below-average looks.
This isn’t to say that all omegas are ugly, or that they have no hope of ever being seen as attractive, however. We can all improve our appearance if we set our minds to the task and work at it.
As it turns out, social ineptitude may be a problem that some omegas are born with. As British psychologist Christopher Frith puts it:
Mentalizing, that is, reacting to others based on what we think are their intentions and desires, is a skill that’s hard-wired into our brains… Most of the time we’re not responding to people’s actual words but to the intentions behind the words.
Therefore, people with a deficient prefrontal cortex tend to have a much more difficult time figuring out what other people are thinking.
In other words—social ineptitude may be something we’re born with. And this may explain why some omega males have such a difficult time understanding social cues and interacting with others in a manner that feels ‘natural.’
But once again, this is something that omegas can work on and improve in their lives. If you’re socially awkward, you can fix it.
3. You’re Unpopular
If you struggle with popularity, there’s a good chance that you’ve got at least a foot inside the metaphorical ‘omega male door.’
Omega males are often rejected, overlooked, and abandoned. People either don’t notice them, or literally wish that they would disappear due to how awkward they make things.
Yep, it hurts. But it can also be fixed. Popularity is another skill that omegas can learn.
4. You Lack Hierarchical Consciousness
Omega males have a difficult time understanding the social hierarchy and how it works. They’re confused about why they’re constantly at the bottom of the pile, and at a loss to understand why they’re so disliked.
This only contributes to their frustration, which makes sense. How can you fix a problem when you don’t understand it?
Thankfully, omegas can fix this problem as well. Learning hierarchical consciousness is both possible and useful for men who want to improve themselves.
5. You Don’t Understand Women
Omega males have the worst luck with women. Some of them grow so frustrated, depressed, and tired of it that they simply stop trying.
But even deeper than their frustration with rejection lives the underlying fact that omega males simply don’t understand how the female brain operates. This makes it more difficult to identify and fix their problems.
The good news is that men who learn to understand women can often improve their odds. I would seriously recommend that you read the book Why Women Have Sex, by Cindy M. Meston and David M. Buss. This book explains how women think about dating and sex, and provides information that’s invaluable to omega males who want to level-up and understand women better.
Drawbacks of Being an Omega Male
Being an omega comes with many drawbacks. But the most notable of these are echoed in the traits listed above. Omegas are:
- Socially inept
- Unaware of the hierarchy and ignorant of how it functions
- Constantly rejected by women
These challenges make life difficult. Omegas are prone to depression, anxiety, self-loathing, and negative self-image issues. Their lives can actually be quite tragic if they don’t make an effort to improve themselves.
Are There Any Benefits of an Omega Male Lifestyle?
The main benefit to being an omega is best characterized in this quote, by American filmmaker David Keith Lynch:
It’s so freeing, it’s beautiful in a way, to have a great failure, there’s nowhere to go but up.
It’s no fun to be a man at the bottom of the hierarchy. But the good thing about being at the bottom is that you are in a perfect position to start making progress.
So, You’re an Omega Male. What Now?
By now, if you’re still reading, you may have come to the conclusion that you are, indeed, an omega male.
If so, what can you do about it?
First things first, it’s important to understand that you have the power to change your destiny and turn things around.
I, like you, used to struggle with women and getting people to like me. I struggled with popularity, I had no sense of style, and I felt completely alone and undesirable.
But I turned it around. And if I can do it, so can you.
These 3 steps will start you on the path to climbing out of the omega male hole, and into a life of happiness, fulfillment, and true masculine power.
Step 1: Find Your Purpose In Life
What do you care about? How do you want to make the world a better place? As a man, what are you passionate about?
Start pursuing the things you love and care about. Put real, genuine effort into these things, and start creating value for other people.
In other words—find your purpose in life and start pursuing it.
This may seem like a lot of work, and it is. But it’s so rewarding, and going through this process is incredibly healing for omega males who struggle with confidence, self-image, and self love.
Step 2: Set Some Goals And Start Working Toward Them
Most omega males I know just coast and drift listlessly along in life. They struggle to change their lives because they don’t have a purpose or a direction. As a result, they fail to develop any true masculine power.
To take back your masculine power and transform your life, it’s important to start setting some goals, or to develop a system for moving forward in life. Setting goals and working to achieve them is tremendously therapeutic for men who are trying to break out of the omega-male mold.
Step 3: Start Plugging Positive, Empowering Wisdom Into Your Life
Read books that will help you level up as a man. Listen to podcasts that will help you learn, grow, and evolve. Instead of listening to sad, depressing music, plug-in and listen to a great audiobook that will help you with learning and reflection.
Instead of sitting around being sad and drowning your feelings in booze, weed, porn, and video games, read positive content that will help to motivate you, inspire you, and change your life for the better.
Embracing your true masculine power begins by taking action. In the words of the wise Lao Tzu:
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”
Hopefully this post has helped you to understand what an omega male is. And even more importantly, I hope it has helped you understand that you don’t need to settle for a life of rejection and sadness.
You can level-up and become a great man. All you need to do is get to work.
Go with grace, my friends. And never give up your power.
Is it bad to be an omega male?
It isn’t fun to be an omega male, but being one doesn’t make you a bad person. The most important thing to remember about being an omega male is that it doesn’t have to be your destiny. You have the power to take control of your life and turn it into something awesome. All you have to do is determine within yourself that you’re tired of settling for less, and start putting in the work to level-up as a man.
What is a gamma male?
What is a sigma male?
The sigma male is the ‘lone wolf’ archetype. He’s a man who chooses to walk away from the social dominance hierarchy, opting for a life of pure freedom over the confines and social trappings of the tribe. Unlike the omega male, however, the sigma walks away from the hierarchy willingly. The omega, by contrast, is usually rejected from the hierarchy without any choice in the matter.