7 Sigma Female Traits and a Man’s Guide to Dating One

There’s a lot of ‘talk’ going on these days about the ‘sigma female.’ 

But a lot of people misunderstand this concept—and thus, misunderstand (or even mislabel) what a true sigma female is. 

As a man, when you look around at how most women live and socialize, you’ll quickly realize that the vast majority of them build most of the crucial infrastructures of their lives within a small segment of one or more localized social hierarchies. 

They do so to maximize their safety and security, and thus increase their odds for surviving and thriving as they seek to build their lives and interface with their selected mate(s).  

Most women follow their basic foundational evolutionary programming to assimilate into the tribe, place themselves in the highest ranking position possible amongst their female peers, partner up with the highest-value man that they can manage to attract, and seek to carve out a life of relative safety and security based on their position within this social framework. 

These types of women may become stay-at-home moms, get jobs, or even start businesses. 

These are the types of women who get together with girlfriends to ‘chat/gossip’ about what’s going on at church or at the local school board, go out on the weekends, host book club meetings, drink wine with their besties, relax by the pool with their husbands, and take the kids to soccer practice.

But if you want to find an example of a true archetypal sigma female, you’re going to need to broaden the scope of your gaze and look outside of these traditional social frameworks. 

Why?

Because, by definition, the sigma female builds her life outside of them.

So how do you identify a true sigma female?

Should you date these types of women?

Are they considered high-value women?

What should you do if you (gasp) catch feelings or fall in love with one? 

Is this the type of woman you should try to date, or is this the type of woman best left to her own devices? 

In this ultimate guide, you’re going to learn everything there is to know about dating, mating, and pair bonding with the archetypal sigma female. 

Let’s dive into it. 

What Is a Sigma Female?

By definition, the sigma archetype, as defined by Vox Day’s socio sexual hierarchy, is the lone wolf archetype. 

Thus, a sigma female is a woman who’s built a life for herself outside of the normal constructs of the human social/tribal dynamic. 

In other words, she’s a true lone wolf. 

This doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s reclusive, though some sigma females can be reclusive. 

It also doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s introverted. 

To truly understand the sigma archetype, you need to think deeper than reclusion or introversion. 

Being a sigma simply means that, unlike the life and mating strategies deployed by the vast majority of human females on planet Earth, her strategy doesn’t involve placing the foundational building blocks of her social life infrastructure upon any one singular social network or hierarchy. 

This type of woman stands on her own two feet, walks away from hierarchical safety, and truly lives a life of freedom and independence. 

This type of lifestyle and life philosophy comes with many benefits—but it also comes at a price (as you’ll learn further along in this guide). 

Does the Socio Sexual Hierarchy Apply to Women?

Vox Day has never advocated that his socio sexual hierarchy system accurately applies to women. And according to everything I’ve read, studied, and observed, I believe this to be true. 

In fact, in this post on his Blogspot blog Vox Popoli, he even makes it a point to point out that, for men looking to date women, it would be more useful to categorize women based on their physical beauty and sexual history rather than on their place within their respective female hierarchies—and there’s an understandable reason for this. 

In fact, according to one of the very first studies ever published on the topic of adult female dominance hierarchies, female hierarchies tend to be less linear, more egalitarian, and less stable than male hierarchies. 

But men, by contrast, evolved to be attracted to women based more on their physical attributes (i.e. their beauty cues). And so, categorizing women based on beauty and sexual history makes sense if you only really care about ranking women based on attractiveness and comparing them to one another. 

So what is the value of applying the socio sexual hierarchy to women?

Well, my opinion is that this is useful because it actually does help us, as men, to understand where women place themselves in relation to other women within the female hierarchy (even if such hierarchies tend not to be as stable over time)—especially if we want to eventually settle down with one amazing woman, build a family, start a tribe, and walk forward into the future together. 

So, while it may not necessarily always translate exactly like the male socio sexual hierarchy translates—it’s still a useful (and fun) tool to use to help us dissect some different nuanced female behavior patterns and personality types.

It also helps us, as men, to be a bit more aware of what types of women we’re dating, and what to watch out for when we date those types of women. 

Speaking of dating women—if you’re interested in maxing out your masculinity and crushing your dating game with an in-depth system that’ll help you to schedule more dates, date more women, and succeed more at dating as a man, check out our Dating and Masculinity Transformation System. 

How Does the Sigma Female Fit in the Socio Sexual Hierarchy?

It’s been said that the sigma male is the least common of all male archetypes, which I believe is true. 

But if that’s true, then the sigma female is even more rare. 

Because when you compare the differences in male evolution to female evolution, you quickly realize that of the two genders, women have evolved and adapted to make use of the human social hierarchies and the human tribal infrastructure to a much greater degree to facilitate their own safety and security.

Thus, why the concept of the sigma female is considered so interesting, curious, and mysterious, and also why it tends to be so romanticized. 

Even Hollywood popular culture literally fetishizes the idea of the sigma female. And yet, it’s such a rare female archetype in the real world that the vast majority of men will probably go their entire lives without really encountering one in person.

Hybrid Sigma Females

One interesting thing about female social hierarchies is that they tend not to be quite as stable or ‘fixed’ as male hierarchies over time. 

Thus, I’ve come to believe that it’s appropriate to recognize that many ‘hybrid’ archetypes can occur among women. 

And this is especially true of sigma females. 

A fully 100% pure sigma female would be nearly impossible to find in the real world. 

There are, however, a lot of women who display a range of one or more specific sigma female traits. 

I label such women as ‘hybrid sigmas,’ because even though they may not be total sigma females in every regard, they at least boast a few of the characteristics and live out some parts of their lives in accordance with the sigma mindset. 

These types of women are far more common, and there are likely to be at least a few of them in every medium to large-sized social group. 

Sigma Female vs Alpha Female

Alpha females themselves are a relatively rare breed among women. Now, keep in mind—when I use the term ‘alpha female,’ I’m not necessarily talking about what many people nowadays consider the stereotypical ‘boss girl.’ 

In my observations, and I suppose this is true across most social circles and hierarchies—true alpha females care more about nurturing the tribe and leading from the front, and less about needing to advertise themselves as ‘boss girls’ to the people around them. 

For the true alpha female, leadership would be more of a responsibility (characterized by higher than average levels of personal sacrifice) and a devotion to the tribe/family, and less of a status symbol. 

Thus, my general observation is that most ‘boss girl’ types probably fall into the realm of delta females (the female equivalent of the delta male) or gamma females (the female equivalent of the gamma male. This would be especially true in cases with rather extreme feminist types, or for women who ‘hate men’ and promote ideals like men are trash), or perhaps sometimes hybrid alphas. 

You’re much less likely to come across a true alpha female than you are one of these other ‘boss babe’ types, because most hierarchies nowadays have many such women among their ranks—and those numbers are growing as time goes on.

So when it comes to true alpha females, just as with alpha males, you’ll generally only locate one within every hierarchical human tribe. 

(Remember—the alpha designation literally means ‘the highest ranking member of one’s sex within their respective, relevant social group.)

The alpha female will always be the highest ranking female of the tribe. She’ll usually be leadership-oriented, she’ll tend to be relatively attractive (though perhaps older), self-sacrificing, organized, wise, empathetic, a champion of female rights, and a spokesperson for the other women of the group to their male counterparts. 

Both the alpha female and the sigma female wield social power, but they do so in different ways and their power comes from different places. 

The alpha female’s power comes from her place within the tribal infrastructure, whereas the sigma female’s power comes from her independence and the fact that she’s not reliant upon the support of the hierarchy to succeed and sustain herself. 

This gives her an air of otherworldly power that, in theory, even the alpha female wouldn’t be able to threaten.

For this reason, alpha females (or to be honest, the vast majority of higher-ranking females) will immediately tend to distrust and dislike the sigma female.

Sigma Female vs Beta Female

Alongside every alpha female will be a woman who helps the alpha to champion the cause of leadership within her own tribe. This is the best friend—the right hand of the alpha female, the trusted confidant; the handmaiden to the queen herself. This is the feminine equivalent of the beta male. 

This woman, the beta, is unerringly loyal to the alpha.

She performs reconnaissance amongst the other women of the tribe and reports back news that could affect the alpha’s position, and helps the alpha in the day-to-day affairs of keeping order, serving the tribe, and carrying out her plans. As a result of her loyalty and contribution, she gets a seat in the tribe beside the alpha at the top-ranking position. 

This earns her a wide range of survival and hierarchical benefits. 

Among other things, she benefits from always being the chosen best friend of the ‘queen bee’ alpha female herself—which in itself is a boon that confers many other smaller additional benefits. 

Most beta females will distrust sigma females because they’ll see them as a threat to not only the alpha female’s position within the hierarchy (because men tend to fall extremely hard and fast for sigma females) but also as a threat to her own station. Because if the alpha female were to be replaced within the hierarchy by the sigma female (which is a valid archetypal fear), then the beta would stand to lose all of her privileges, and would thus end up relegated to a lower social rank as a result. 

Sigma Female vs Omega Female

Interestingly, the omega female would tend to either hate/disdain the sigma, or look up to her, idolize her, and possibly even see her as a source of inspiration. She may see the sigma as the type of woman she would desire to become at some point in her future (or at least fantasize about becoming). 

See, omega females are generally overlooked by men. These are the types of women who are unattractive to the point where even lesser attractive men won’t generally pay much attention to them. 

They’re the female equivalent to the male omegas. 

This creates a sort of desperation and bitterness within the context of their perception of the dating marketplace and the world at large. And these types of women, very specifically, will tend to maintain inward bitterness toward alpha and beta females due to their higher status and the fact that most men will chase these types of women while overlooking the omega.

With that being said—for some omega females, the sigma represents everything she wishes she possessed in regards to alpha and beta females. 

Sigma females threaten alpha and beta supremacy by building their own power outside of the tribal hierarchy. When the omega sees how the alphas and betas grow defensive and fearful in the presence of an attractive sigma female, they generally can’t help but to fantasize about the idea of having that kind of power over the very women who’ve made them feel belittled, unattractive, and overlooked in their own lives. 

Thus, sigma females will sometimes find willing and enthusiastic discipleship amongst the ranks of the female omegas of any particular social hierarchy. 

How to Spot a Sigma Female: 7 Fascinating Traits 

Alright, now that we’ve defined what the sigma female (and the much more common hybrid sigma female) is, let’s dive in a little deeper and talk about how to spot one by discussing some of the most common traits that they’ll tend to exhibit. 

1. She Doesn’t ‘Conform’ to Society

Sigma females understand that conformity to society is a popular trope amongst the vast majority of women. But they also see this conformity as a fear-based reaction to the inner desire for safety and security that all women evolved with. 

To a degree, true sigma females have learned to stand toe to toe with this fear and overcome it within their own psyche. 

They’ve surpassed the need to conform to society’s standards in order to create safety and security for themselves. 

In other words, they’ve learned that ‘selling your soul to the devil,’ with the devil being a placeholder for ‘becoming a slave to the process of striving to make people like you,’ is neither required to secure safety/security, nor is it necessarily the most efficient means of achieving success for women who are willing to put in the inner-work required to overcome it. 

2. She’s Self-Sufficient and Independent

Some sigma females are high-ranking CEOs, powerful attorneys, world-renowned surgeons or medical professionals, or even spiritual or religious leaders. 

A true sigma female is a woman who’s learned to sustain herself. 

And by virtue of this, she can even compete with men in the vast majority of playing fields in the game of life due to the fact that she’s learned how to become independent—to the point where she neither needs nor seeks the approval of other people within her spheres of influence. 

She doesn’t necessarily reject approval, admiration, friendship, or kinship with others. But she doesn’t seek these things out as essential tools in her survival tool kit, either (unless they’re actually essential to her strategy). 

This makes her unusually strong and formidable in the realm of the female hierarchy. 

3. She’s Not Reliant Upon Any Singular Social Circle

Sigma females definitely make use of human social circles. 

In fact, they may drift or bounce from social circle to social circle. 

Sigma females have simply learned to exist with a much lesser dependency on tribal infrastructures—which is the trait that really sets them apart from all other types. 

Many sigma females travel as a part of their lifestyle, and they may even do the rounds and pass through their favorite or most useful social circles on a recurring basis to keep up their relationships and to continue to foster new friendships that could lead to greater opportunities—not just in business, but also for their lifestyle and even for dating and the opportunity to form romantic relationships with attractive men.

4. She’s Highly Adaptable

Sigma females have learned to adapt to a wide range of different types of situations. 

They can generally find their inner peace and self-soothe in any and all different types of environments. 

These types of women are seldom flustered, and they almost always appear completely at home and comfortable in their own skin—regardless of what’s going on around them.

5. She Prioritizes Her Own Journey

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This is actually an inherently masculine trait that sigma females have learned to master for themselves. 

Romance, success at their business, reproduction, and/or even their legacy at large may all take a backseat to the journey itself. 

They learn to live every day in the here and now. 

They plan for the future, but become true masters of their own present destiny by creating it on a daily (or even minute-by-minute) basis.

This makes it highly unlikely that a sigma female could ever actually feel at peace settling down with a man unless she intentionally decided to alter her life’s journey to conform to that man’s mode of being and way of living. 

Thus, it would be a rare thing indeed for a full-fledged sigma female to settle down with one man, much less to relinquish frame control of the relationship to him. 

Note: Keep in mind that hybrid sigma females are much more likely to settle down and give up their ‘wandering ways’ for love. 

6. She’s Often Seen as a ‘Loner’

This is probably the greatest weakness and vulnerability for sigma females. 

Oftentimes, females draw an incredible amount of power from their ability to interface on a deeper level with the other humans around them. 

Unlike men who are not as well suited to vulnerable communication and soft, empathetic communion, the vast majority of human women utilize their softness, their female empathy, and their caring feminine nature to build relationships, establish trust, and gain the favor of other men and women in their social circles.

Alpha females are masters of this strategy. 

But sigma females, due to their uniquely masculine approach to building their own life journey outside of the realm of traditional social circles, generally tend to keep most people at arm’s length.

In fact, even sigma females who’ve learned to strike a nearly perfect balance between their masculine and feminine energies could still suffer from this drawback and cause other people to feel like they’re never actually truly close to the real sigma female herself. 

Rather, empathetic people who interact with her (people who are adept at reading body cues and social energy) are highly likely to feel like they’re interacting with the hardened, femininely tempered masculine persona she’s developed for herself to facilitate her ability to live a more detached sigma female lifestyle. 

This is a negative for sigma males as well—but it would tend to hit females harder because it goes so against their natural social tribe-building adaptations. 

At least sigma males are perceived as being mysterious and unpredictable—whereas sigma females would tend to be seen as inwardly cold and frigid, and perhaps even emotionally vacant or manipulative due to their ability to project a synthesized ‘warmth’ to other people. 

This is actually a turnoff that could even be considered a ‘red flag warning sign’ to wise, high-value men who would otherwise consider dating her.  

And to be honest, this issue can sometimes prove problematic for sigma female types. 

With that being said, it’s probably also worth noting that wise sigma females understand this. 

And at some point along the journey, they generally end up making a decision (either consciously or subconsciously) to embrace the fact that this drawback is a worthwhile tradeoff for the benefits they derive from developing the hardened capability of sustaining themselves and maintaining their freedom and independence. 

7. She Doesn’t Live For Attention

In an age where attention is sometimes seen as the currency of success (especially for women), sigma females generally learn to ‘let go’ of the need for it. 

This doesn’t mean that they’re not going to have a social media presence. 

It simply means that they’ve learned to detach their personal value and worth from the number of subscribers or followers on their social media apps. 

This is actually a very enlightened skill that more mature sigma females learn to develop for themselves. 

However, once again, it’s a feature that continues to be problematic for them in their dating lives in the sense that it can threaten the confidence of men who haven’t found such inner peace within themselves.

What Kinds of Men Are Sigma Females Attracted To?

The natural tendency would be for most men to believe that the sigma female would be the most interested in dating other sigma males.

And perhaps idealistically this is true.

But the deeper truth is that sigma females don’t need men in the same traditional sense that most women in the world need men in. 

A true sigma female isn’t going to be reliant upon men for her survival to any significant capacity. 

Plus, the truth of the matter is that there are going to be so few men who could actually benefit her in ways that she couldn’t benefit herself that it’ll be unlikely for her to form long-term romantic bonds with those types of men, anyway. 

Especially when there are younger, less experienced, more submissive women surrounding those powerful men and offering themselves as potential suitable mates. 

Most true sigma females aren’t going to be interested in the types of attraction metrics that most women are characteristically looking for. 

For example, the trope of a rich and powerful businesswoman dating a young, financially destitute poet because his poet’s mind enthralls her and because she loves the idea of living an adventure through his poverty-stricken poet lifestyle might bring her a sort of romantic excitement.

But successful sigma females can afford to date men like this because they’re not reliant on men for their safety or security. Thus, their mating behavior patterns are likely to differ from those of women who are more reliant on their male partners for their survival. 

In short, sigma females tend to date the men they’re most interested in for a time duration that best suits them. Then, they’re highly likely to drop those romantic interests and move on to the next thing whenever it suits them. 

Advantages of Dating a Sigma Female

The main advantages to dating a sigma female come from their often more mature levels of wisdom, enlightenment, and rational/intellectual thought. 

Most men would probably be surprised to learn how enthralling it can be to sit down with a legitimate sigma female and engage in a conversation with her. This is even true of hybrid sigma females.

This is the type of woman who could probably get you to fall in love with her after a 20-minute conversation about philosophy, the arts, politics, economics, science, etc. 

A secondary advantage is that you’re highly unlikely to encounter much in the way of drama.

In order for a woman to assume such a mantle of self-sufficiency in life, she’d need to learn to cut through a lot of the typical static drama that plagues many social circles, and dismantle it with straightforwardness and rational thinking.

And dating this type of woman often proves to be an extremely pleasurable and ‘refreshing’ experience for men.

Disadvantages of Dating a Sigma Female

The vast majority of men in this world will never even meet a true sigma female, much less date one—thus, the main disadvantage is that you’re highly unlikely to ever encounter one.

You’re much more likely to encounter hybrid sigma females who embody many sigma-like traits and are living their lives in an ongoing experiment devoted to learning what it means to dip their toes into the pool of individuality, freedom, and nonconformity. 

But this will often be to a minimal extent, and likely won’t be the driving force behind their foundational life philosophies. 

With that being said—if you ever do get to date a true sigma or hybrid sigma female, then one of the most significant disadvantages you’re likely to run into is the fact that this type of woman is highly likely to expose any lack of self-esteem or confidence you may feel about yourself. 

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In the presence of true sigma female energy, the vast majority of men are highly likely to feel a sort of ‘romantic existential dread’ over the fact that this woman engages such strong romantic feelings within them, while also serving as a constant, passive reminder of how little they can actually offer her in terms of real-world value that she can’t provide for herself. 

To put it simply, this can make a lot of men feel woefully inadequate. And this can be a massive turnoff to dating such a woman.

A secondary disadvantage would be that, for some high-value men who’ve learned to navigate the world and the dating marketplace successfully, sigma or hybrid sigma females can sometimes give off an air of ‘loftiness’ that can come across as needlessly arrogant, unavoidably ignorant, and perhaps even annoying. 

Some men reject sigma-type women for this reason, opting instead to date sweeter, more loving, more feminine women in other archetypes. 

Well-Known Sigma Female Characters

It could be said that a healthy percentage of the most popular, interesting, and loved female characters in movies and TV are sigma females.

In fact, it’s far more difficult to find an accurate depiction of an alpha female in pop culture than it is to find an accurate (I use that term loosely) depiction of a sigma female. 

Here are some of my favorite well-known examples. 

1. Daenerys Targaryen – Game Of Thrones

A lot of people might mislabel Emilia Clarke’s famous Game of Thrones ‘Mother of Dragons’ character as an alpha female—but the truth of the matter is that Daenerys Targaryen’s story is the story of a sigma female who built an entire imperial military hierarchy (and in doing, became an alpha) simply out of a desire to achieve her own personal life goals. 

Never has there been a more prolific example of a sigma female character in all of cinema.

Even the lovers she encounters along the journey remain in a submissive place beside her.

They’ll bed her in the evening—and at dawn, they’ll bend the knee and call her their queen.

And the alpha females of the story (most notably Sansa Stark and Cersei Lannister) even despise her and distrust her with a deep and profound loathing—which would be the exact type of reaction you would expect from an alpha female in the presence of a sigma. 

Such is the power of the true archetypal sigma female. 

2. Black Widow/Natasha Romanoff – Marvel Cinematic Universe

The Marvel Cinematic Universe is filled with all kinds of different characters and archetypes from all over the sociality spectrum.

But the best example, in my opinion, of a sigma female to exist within this universe is Scarlett Johansson’s character Black Widow, or Natasha Romanoff.

Unlike Daenerys Targaryen, Black Widow’s goal isn’t to build an empire and achieve world domination. 

Her goals are more personal and nuanced than this. 

She’s on a personal journey to become the most effective assassin/combatant she can be—partly to serve her own needs for safety and security, and partly to forward her own life goals and to create success for herself. 

With such talent and skill, she’s obviously constantly sought to be recruited by powerful world players. And sometimes, she does spend a season or two ‘playing games’ with these players (such as with the Avengers). 

But very rarely do these ‘other players’ have the power to exercise true control over her.

She’s a loner, she’s dangerous, she’s charming, and she’s formidable—all of which are marked signs of a true archetypal sigma female. 

3. Katniss Everdeen – The Hunger Games

If you’ve read the novels or watched the movies, then you’ve probably been struck by Katniss’s growth from being a rather formidable and competent youth to being a stone-cold veteran killer/survivor of the Hunger Games—capable of winning the apocalyptic contest not only once, but twice. 

But you’ll also probably notice, on a more subtle level, how untouchable her character is on an emotional level—much to the dismay of the various different men who try to win her over through romantic advances. 

She seems almost impervious to any emotional bonding or contact whatsoever. In many ways, her journey and her mission require her to create a ‘hard outer shell’ that leaves her feeling cold, vacant, and detached on the inside. 

Katniss Everdeen is a darker example of what it means to be a sigma female, in the sense that her’s is the story of a woman who utilized her trauma to become powerful—but while doing so, succumbed to the darker and more masculine elements of that journey. 

Thus, she experiences firsthand the massive potential downside of always keeping people at arm’s length, even when doing so might actually be to her own detriment—the archetypal curse of all sigma females. 

Conclusion

The sigma female (and the much more common hybrid sigma) is indeed an interesting archetype—and an important aspect of the female behavior spectrum for men to understand.

But should you date one? 

At the end of the day, I think that the message for men here is this:

Be the best man you can be, and date the best women possible, regardless of their archetype—and don’t get so hung up on just one woman (especially a sigma) that you neglect yourself or your own journey as a man. 

Date many women, and always choose first the women who choose YOU first. 

Go with grace, my friends, and never give up your power. 

If you want more tips, tricks, techniques, and strategies for becoming a more masculine modern man and increasing your dating success, check out our flagship Dating and Masculinity Transformation System. 

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