/  Dating

12 Second Date Ideas That Don’t Suck from a Dating Coach

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Joshua Sigafus

Dating, Relationships

Joshua has 15 years of writing experience within the complex territories of dating, masculinity, and relationships. His own personal life journey was kick-started by a pivotal marital breakdown of his own and led him down a path of self-discovery and masculine transformation, culminating in him developing a career as a men's dating coach. Read full bio.

Last Updated: Mar 13, 2024
16 min read
Second Date Ideas Bearded Man and Blonde Woman Laughing and Having a Good time on Second Date

So you met an awesome girl (or matched with one on a dating app). 

You got together for a first date—and it went so well that you’re already planning on asking her out again.

But what makes a good second date?

The second date is important because it represents the transition from first impressions to a more solidified idea of the potential of your dynamic together. 

A poorly planned or badly executed second date can ruin your chances with a high value woman

By contrast, nailing the second date and making it awesome will help to firmly establish you as a solid, high value dating option in her mind. 

I’ve been on more second dates than I can count. 

I’ve had some great ones, and I’ve had some trainwrecks. 

I’ve planned second dates that absolutely crushed it—and I’ve winged it on second dates where I showed up unprepared and ruined my chances. 

And in this post, I’m going to dig deep into my own personal repertoire to bring you the top 12 second date ideas that I use, in hopes of giving you your best shot at proving that you’re a high value man and helping you to be successful in your dating life. 

As a bonus, I’m also going to give you an inside look at the strategies I use on each one of these second date ideas.

Let’s get crackin’.

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12 Good Second Date Ideas

1. Your House for Dinner 

Mother Teresa Quote 1

This is by far my absolute favorite second date idea. In fact, this is the option I use 90% of the time. 

It’s pretty simple. 

Invite her over to dinner, cook her your signature dish, pour a few glasses of wine, and engage in some conversation

Show off your house, show her that you’re a high value man by inviting her into your frame and space and displaying high value markers, and make your move after dinner is over and you get her cuddled up on the couch. 

Simple, yet effective. 

My Strategy

I make sure to light some candles and incense to set the mood. I also make sure that my house is clean, and that I spritz a bit of my cologne on the bedspread before she arrives. 

Sharing a meal together gives you the opportunity for connection and to learn about one-another. It also gives you the opportunity to showcase your impressive cooking skills. 

2. A Wine Tasting – At Your Place

Once again, this is a second-date idea where you invite her over to your house. 

But this one works really well if the time for the date falls between meals or later at night (after dinner time). 

Pick out a few bottles of wine, and have her over to try them with you. 

If you’re not a wine guy, that’s ok. Check out our gentleman’s guide to wine for some guidance. 

Set the mood, serve her some crackers and cheese, and put on some music. 

Treat it like a real wine-tasting. Ask her what she thinks of the different options—but also engage her in conversation between sips and samples. 

Not sure what to talk about? Here are some awesome conversation starters.

My Strategy

The most important thing to remember here is this:

DO NOT get smashed. 

And if you’re planning to escalate and go for the hookup, DO NOT get her drunk. 

Drink slowly and easily. Spend most of your time flirting with her, lightly teasing her, learning about her, and just enjoying the atmosphere together. 

Eventually work your way up to kissing her to ‘see how the wine tastes on her lips.’ 

It’s a classic move that works every time (as long as she’s actually into you). 

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3. An On-The-Town, On-Foot Adventure

This is my second favorite type of second date, and is generally the option I’ll use if we already slept together on the first date. 

This date basically involves picking her up, heading to a fun part of town where there’s lots to do (bars, clubs, restaurants, entertainment, etc.), and then just walking around looking for an ‘in the moment’ adventure. 

The trick here is not to make a solid plan. 

The plan is simply this: 

You go to a fun part of town, hang out together, and find cool stuff to do. 

My Strategy

The strategy here is to kindle excitement and attraction through experiencing the unknown together

Women love it when men take them on adventures. 

Believe it or not, women grow tired of the same old boring dinner dates. 

They want to feel alive. 

They want to date men who create an impact and make them feel something

And one of the best ways to prime her to feel the emotional impact of the unknown is to get her out of the usual ‘boring date zone’ and take her somewhere where there’s a strong possibility for adventure and discovery.

4. Dinner at the Park

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I go for this option when I’m seeing a woman I really enjoy talking to and want to engage with on a more intellectual level. 

The great thing about this second date idea is that it gets the two of you alone in a relaxing setting where you can just share a meal together and really enjoy each other’s company. 

My style for this type of date is simple:

  1. I pick her up. 
  2. We go to my favorite taco place. 
  3. We get some incredible street tacos. 
  4. Then, I take her to this beautiful lakeside park not far from my house. 
  5. We find an isolated picnic table with a great view, eat our tacos, and just talk.

My Strategy

The strategy here is to get away from the distractions, hustle, and bustle of other humans. 

Getting her alone will create the opportunity for intellectual intimacy. 

In this private setting, you can really dig in and get her to open up about herself. 

Secondly, eating dinner outside at a beautiful park creates a very romantic atmosphere. 

This then creates the perfect opportunity for romantic hand holding, slow walks around the lake, and even watching the sunset.

5. Bartend Together

This date idea works really well as an afternoon date. 

Ask her what her favorite cocktail is. Then, ask her if she knows how to make it. 

If she says yes, invite her over to make you one, and tell her that you’ll return the favor by mixing one of your favorite drinks for her. 

Use this opportunity to create something together, to learn about each other, to flirt, and just to have fun with it. 

My Strategy

The strategy behind this date idea involves creating something enjoyable and unique together. 

A lot of people associate their favorite drinks with comfortability. 

Sometimes, people are even emotionally attached to their favorite drink or beverage.

You can use this opportunity to learn about her. The combination of creating together and doing something fun will lead to the perfect atmosphere for escalation and connection. 

Not a bartender? Not to worry. Check out this guide for some delicious cocktail recipes. 

Quick Tip: Once again, if you’re planning to go for the hookup, don’t get her smashed. Drink lightly for fun, not to get drunk. 

6. Cook a Meal Together

I like to think of this option as a blended date, falling somewhere between ‘having her over for dinner’ and ‘making drinks together.’ 

Personally, I like to start this date off by going shopping together. 

We plan out the meal, get the ingredients, then head back to my place and create a beautiful gourmet meal together—complete with plenty of flirting, connecting, engagement, and romance. 

My Strategy

The magic behind this date idea is that you’ll be working together to create something enjoyable. 

When the two of you work side by side and enjoy each-other’s company, you create a vibe that really sets the mood for attraction and connection. 

Pair this with the emotional attachment to sultry comfort food, and you create an environment that’s ripe for romance. 

7. Go Somewhere with a Beautiful View


As humans, we have a definitive weakness for beauty. 

We love to look at the horizon and appreciate breathtaking landscapes, golden sunsets, trees that change colors with the seasons, glorious mountains, magnificent oceans, etc. 

Even the busy metropolitan skyline can qualify.

Beautiful views evoke powerful emotions within us that can make us feel a wide range of emotions.

Remember—women want to feel something. 

So what could be better than a romantic dinner, walk, or hike that eventually culminates in a breathtaking view?

This second date idea gives you the perfect context for romance. 

My Strategy

The key to this one is planning. 

You’ll want to scout out the perfect location beforehand, and determine the best time of day for maximum effect. 

This date idea works really well because it shows her that:

  • You’re willing to put in the effort to plan
  • You have a keen eye for beauty
  • You’re willing to take control and pull her into your frame

It’s a win-win-win, gentlemen.

8. Share an Interest with Her

Do you have a unique or obscure hobby or interest that she doesn’t have much experience with?

If so, you could leverage this to schedule a second date where you invite her to go along with you and partake of this interest with you. 

The trick with this one is to bring her into your frame and share a bit of your life with her. 

If a woman likes you, she’s going to want to experience you and learn about you. And this is an awesome date idea that capitalizes on that energy and desire. 

My Strategy

Try to choose interests that she may also appreciate. 

For example:

I play guitar and write songs in my downtime, so I like to break that out for a serenade from time to time. 

But sometimes, I’ll go above and beyond this to invite her out to an open-mic night with me. 

I’ll buy her some drinks, play some songs, and just share that experience with her. 

Women are generally really into this kind of thing. 

So don’t be afraid to be yourself and invite her along for the ride. 

9. Go On a Short Road Trip

The idea behind this date is simple. 

Tell her what time you’re going to pick her up. 

Plan out a few stops (a few of your favorite places), roll the windows down, crank up some tunes, and just enjoy hitting the open road together. 

This doesn’t have to be a super elaborate date. The idea is to explore and discover things together while making memories and enjoying each other’s company. 

My Strategy

Personally, I love using car rides to learn more about the woman I’m dating. 

I’ll ask her what music she likes, put it on, and then ask her about her life. 

It’s so much fun to get a woman comfortable in this element, because secrets shared on the open road while driving around late at night tend to be very intimate and vulnerable. 

There’s just something about this energy that really lends to connection and attraction. 

10. Share Your Favorite Music

William Shakespeare quote

Once again, this date is going to involve you having her over to your place. 

But instead of focusing specifically on drinks or a meal, the focus is simply on sharing your favorite music with one-another. 

I’ll usually extend the invite for this date if we’ve already been talking about music, and if she’s already expressed her love for a certain band or album. 

I’ll say something like this:

“Well hey, why don’t you come over on Friday, and we’ll listen to it? We can drink a bit of wine and I’ll cook you dinner. You can give me the ‘411’ on the songs. We’ll make it a whole thing.” 

My Strategy

The strategy here is to tap into the powerful emotions that are evoked when we listen to our favorite songs, albums, and artists. 

When you combine these powerful feelings with a candlelit atmosphere, talking, connecting, flirting, touching, etc, you create an atmosphere that’s ripe for desire and escalation. 

Simply put, it’s romantic as hell—and women love it. 

11. Discover Something New Together

The idea here is for both of you to go and discover or do something that neither of you has ever experienced before. 

A great example of this would be to make plans to visit a museum that neither of you have visited before, to explore a park that neither of you has hiked before, to scope out a part of town that neither of you has explored before, etc. 

Need some ideas? Check out this post for some awesome new date location inspiration. 

My Strategy 

The strategy here is to combine the thrill of adventure and discovery with that special sense of ‘creating first-time memories together.’ 

This isn’t you introducing her to elements of your life that already existed before. 

This is you literally taking the time to create new elements and experiences specifically with her. 

These are memories that the two of you will share forever, and this is incredibly meaningful to women. 

Use it as an opportunity to bond, to get to know each other, and just to experience some life together.

12. Go Swimming or Hiking

JK Rowling Quote

This may sound really specific—but hiking and swimming are great date ideas for a set of very specific reasons. 

First of all, they both incorporate physical exercise into the mix. 

Physical exercise is a recognized aphrodisiac

So when you expend energy hiking over rocks or swimming in the ocean, you’re just going to feel great.

But doing it together is also going to give you an incredible opportunity to build up some attraction and chemistry, as well as some good old-fashioned lust for each other. 

Swimming is really fun because both of you will be dressed down a bit. This’ll give you some hot opportunities for flirting, sexy touching, and just in general physically escalating and building connection with her in a very ‘skin to skin’ fashion.

Now hiking takes things in a slightly different direction. 

When you gear up and hit the trail, you’ll be embarking on an adventure together where you’ll have a lot of opportunities for flirting and escalation.

But, it’ll also be combined with the excitement of experiencing something new. 

This gives you an opportunity to hold her hand, to help her climb over rocks, to tease her a little bit, to put her on your back and give her a piggyback ride—all kinds of amazing opportunities to just escalate, flirt, and have fun. 

My Strategy

The sexual energy of the physical activity, combined with the adventure of doing a new activity together, will place both of you into a situation where attraction and chemistry are highly likely to spring to life.

The key to this one is simply this:

Don’t be afraid to escalate. 

If you balk, keep your hands to yourself, and/or otherwise fail to engage with her as more than a friend during these activities, you’re going to find yourself with a one-way ticket to the friendzone.

On the flipside, if you can hold masculine frame, show her that you’re confident, and escalate properly—you’re going to learn very quickly just how much she’s into you.

And it’ll be totally worth it.

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3 Best Second Date Ideas When It’s Raining

In my way of thinking, the best second date ideas when you’re expecting rain are options that won’t require the two of you to run around outside. 

She probably won’t want to ruin her makeup, and it’s a lot more fun to get cozy inside than to get wet and cold while trying to go out for drinks or dinner. 

Therefore, my three favorite options for rainy-day second dates are:

  1. Your house for dinner
  2. A wine tasting at your house
  3. Cooking a meal together

How to Suggest Second Date Ideas

The best way to suggest a second date idea is to just take the initiative and ask her out. 

As a man, it’s in your best interest to hold masculine frame and invite her into your life for dates. 

Men who think too much about getting her approval for dates run the risk of looking feminine, weak, and less manly. 

Women want men to be bold, take the lead, and make the decisions. They want to be led, seduced, and pulled into the man’s frame. 

Need more information about this? Check out our in-depth write-up on the alpha male

So decide on a date idea that you’d like to enjoy with her, and ask her out. 



There you have it. 

12 second date ideas that’ll woo her and make her triple-glad that she said yes. 

At the end of the day, however, never forget that your attractiveness as a man will be heavily dependent on your dating marketplace value. 

If you want to command a higher value on the marketplace, you need to constantly be leveling up to be the best man that you can possibly be. 

So always seek to become a better man—every day striving to be slightly better than you were yesterday. 

Now get out there and have some fun. 

For more tips and advice on how to level up as a man, don’t forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Go with grace, and never give up your power.